Additional information
by Jim Byrne (Author)
This book has been specially designed to provide some quick relief up front. That means that, right at the start of the book, I share with you some of the most powerful insights into how to have a happy relationships. I then help you to complete a couple of exercises that take five minutes per day, and which will begin to change your relationship situation almost at once.In Part 1, you will find a self-study program which helps you, slowly, and in managed steps, to review a range of insights that will transform your ability to relate to your partner much more successfully.Every day, you will be asked to read just three of those insights. That means, three fairly brief descriptions of ways to be a happier couple. This should not take more than five or six minutes of your day. You are advised to then discuss those three insights with your partner. This might take a further ten minutes.Day by day, this DIY course - which you share with your partner - builds up, slowly but surely, into a seven week program which is designed to deliver a happy relationship for you and your partner, if you both work at it. Your time commitment to this program is likely to be less than half an hour each day. Is your relationship life worth an investment of less than thirty minutes per day?All you have to do to succeed is to follow the seven week program systematically! Diligently! At the end of seven weeks, you switch to Part 2. Part 2 teaches you how to change your relationship habits, which were probably mainly copied - and turned into habits - from watching your parents' marriage when you were too young to be emotionally intelligent enough to know what you were copying - (starting when you were below the age of five years, and up to about the age of ten years). This part of the program involves thinking back to your early childhood; how your parents treated you; how they related to each other; and how you felt about all of that. Out of this will come a quick and easy process for changing your 'relationship role model' and your 'relationship mate model'. The effect is that you will begin to behave in more constructive and loving ways with your partner, which will normally elicit new, more positive, more loving behaviours from your partner.Then, in Part 3, I present the conclusions of an extensive study that I published elsewhere; which is, essentially, a set of 17 guidelines for you to follow on how to be a more effective love-and-relationships partner. There is some (minimal) overlap between this part and Part 1.With this part, I ask you to review those 17 guidelines three times, to get them into long-term memory. (Anything that you read just once is likely to be forgotten within a day or two!)Finally, in Part 4, I teach you the most important things to know about your own personality, and your partner's personality, so that you can relate to each other from more rational, reasonable, adult parts of yourselves. I do this by teaching you the most important elements of Transactional Analysis (TA), which is a way to understand and change your own and your partner's way of communicating in your relationship - from unhelpful habits to effective ways of avoiding communications breakdowns.Additionally, I have added Appendix A, at the back of this book, for those readers who are too emotionally upset about their relationship problems to be able to work on Part 1. Appendix A is a form of my Six Windows Model, especially written for couples. This is a simple process that helps you to review the problem that is upsetting you, in six different ways, so that you can feel better about having that problem in your life. (Then the main body of the book will help you to get the problem out of your life, by preserving and improving your relationship; or ending it!)What you will get is a very happy relationship, with the person you love!
