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by A. F. Rose (Author)
2024...
To sum up life before transitioning, it would be fear and trauma.Fear has absolutely no place in AF's life anymore. Going wherever and doing whatever, not allowing fear to keep life "safe." In the past year, AF has gone to a multitude of places that would not be viewed as transgender-friendly and living her best life.
Trauma is still a work in progress. Much of it was rooted in being invisible, and led to triggered PTSD responses in the present. She learned to weigh out responses to a situation and question how much of what she felt is the weight of past trauma and how much is what had just happened. Visibility has allowed healing from a lifetime of trauma to begin, and made her a far better person.
Summing up her present life is: Joy and purpose.The joy experienced every day seems almost too good to be true. A visibly authentic life is so different than imagined and so much better than the invisible, pre-transition, life was.
Purpose started forming for her in August of 2024 at the NAWIC National Conference, becoming a vocal transgender and queer advocate shortly after the conference, thanks to one of the speakers there. Her life's purpose now is to make a way for younger transgender and queer folk to survive their youth and thrive as adults. She's passionate about doing whatever can be done so that younger transgender people can safely live authentic and fulfilling lives.
My Life in Transition - Becoming a Phoenix, AF Rose shares the in-between parts during 2024. Painful yet healing to write, it is a sharing of reaching the darkest depths of suicidal ideation. From being sure that life was no longer worth living to growing out of the ashes and becoming a proverbial phoenix.
Her hope in writing this is that someone who is in their own struggle can push through their personal darkness and become a phoenix too. No matter how bad things may seem, life is worth living. Life has become so full of joy now, and AF is so glad that the way here was found.
