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by Traci L. Jones (Author)
Jazz Sanders has killed her best friend, Landi. Not on purpose, but accidentally while driving home from a party. While most people, including Landi's parents, offer her sympathy and forgiveness, Jazz feels unworthy of either because Jazz has a secret about what she was doing before her best friend sailed through the windshield and died on the road.
Each day Jazz struggles to present a normal face to her family and everyone at school to avoid sympathy and therapy. And each day she thinks about how she no longer deserves love, human kindness, or forgiveness from anyone. Jazz finds herself seeking help at a nearby Catholic church, looking for some guidance in fighting her panic attacks and moments of soul-crushing self-blame.
There Jazz learns about absolution and embarks on a journey of self-forgiveness. She finally settles on trying to emulate the best of Landi by volunteering at the children's hospital where Landi spent every Friday after school. Can Jazz find a way to forgive herself or will she spend the rest of her life punishing herself for Landi's death?
