{"product_id":"the-art-of-almost-losing-it-paperback","title":"The Art of Almost Losing It - Paperback","description":"\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cp style=\"text-align: right;\"\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/reportcopyrightinfringement.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\"\u003e\u003cb\u003eReport copyright infringement\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cp\u003eby \u003cb\u003eAlina Jacobs\u003c\/b\u003e (Author)\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThere comes a time in every almost-thirty-year-old woman's life when getting kidnapped off the street is preferable to admitting that the hot, rich boyfriend you've been bragging about for months does not, in fact, exist.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eYes, it's terrifying being stuffed in the trunk of a Mercedes, but I would rather be locked in a stranger's penthouse than sleeping on the floor of my parents' apartment like the loser daughter I am.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHonestly?\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt's nice to get some alone time. And my own bathroom.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe bribes me with money not to call the police.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI scream at him for forcing me to go to brunch as his prisoner at the hottest restaurant in New York.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNow everyone in my parents' aggressively posh Manhattan neighborhood thinks we're dating.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eBuckle up, buddy.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eI have a full wedding itinerary to attend, and congratulations-you're my fake boyfriend.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eUnfortunately, my kidnapper is the worst fake boyfriend in the history of fake boyfriends.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe's mean.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAloof.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eEmotionally unavailable.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd deeply offended by how much time I spend on my phone.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMeanwhile, I'm trying to ignore how yummy he smells, all muscular and tall as he fumes next to me in bed, furious because I asked him when the sexy portion of the kidnapping is going to happen.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIt's a fair question, though, right?!? I thought kidnapping came with benefits!\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eGuess my kidnapper didn't want me that much after all.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eMen lying about their desire for a relationship. Story of my life.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eNow I'm trapped.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eHe's miserable.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAnd somehow, this is starting to feel dangerously like a relationship.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis is a standalone spicy Rom Com, HEA guaranteed! Takeout is clandestinely ordered, someone gets a black eye from a magic dildo, and sexy kidnappers deeply regret their actions. You do not need to read the other books in the series to LOL with this one! \u003c\/p\u003e\n            \u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eNumber of Pages:\u003c\/strong\u003e 620\u003c\/div\u003e\n            \u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/strong\u003e 1.25 x 8 x 5.25 IN\u003c\/div\u003e\n            \u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePublication Date:\u003c\/strong\u003e August 04, 2026\u003c\/div\u003e\n            ","brand":"BooksCloud","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46724703027397,"sku":"9781970969030","price":40.64,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0757\/6718\/5605\/files\/u7JhHk3hkE9781970969030.webp?v=1786672638","url":"https:\/\/selloorium.com\/products\/the-art-of-almost-losing-it-paperback","provider":"Selloorium","version":"1.0","type":"link"}