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by Christine Finley (Illustrator), Jacqueline Sideman Guttman (Author)
Although there is no denying the tragedy of the death of a spouse at a young age, less attention is given to the so-called norm: losing one's spouse - usually a husband - at a point in life when it's far more difficult to reinvent oneself, after decades of marriage.
In particular, life for an older widow usually lacks the stabilizing structure of a job or the necessity of caring for children. Women who married in the 1960s and even the full-of-change '70s, many of whom had lived for decades within a traditional structure in which the "guy stuff" included everything from paying bills to killing bugs, now must learn to become totally self-reliant. And we do it, most of us, pleased that we are so competent and furious that we have no choice, while often also dealing with broken hearts both figurative and literal, diabetes, joint replacements, high blood pressure, and, sometimes, the financial issues that often accompany these and other problems.
My survival tool was writing about the varied experiences of a newly single life, of coming of age at 70-plus. Some of these essays deal with living alone, handling health or disability issues, taking care of home repairs, and searching for male companionship; others are general observations on life, but with a glance at loss and survival. I hope they will make you laugh with recognition, for laughter may be the best survival tool of all.
